1 In Motivation

6 Steps to Becoming the Best You

I know her well.  I see her all the time. She echoes in my mind when I feel inadequate, weak, and irrelevant. At times she radiates positivity and light. She is responsible, charming, motivated. She practices self-care, unapologetically pursues her dreams and surrounds herself with people she loves. She never compares herself to others, has no time for the haters.  She is beauty, grace and perfection.

She’s not real, of course, at least not in the traditional sense. I have probably invented her a thousand times over. She’s the person I’ve created in my mind that I strive to become every, single day.

She is different for each of us.

Whether it’s to be physically fit, a successful blogger, or the adventurous traveler, we have dreams that we’ve filed away in the back corners of our minds labeled Maybe Someday. Unfortunately, for many of us (often myself included) the need for stability and comfort inhibits us from going after what we truly want regardless of what the rewards of doing so may be.

But this is the moment you can change that. As they say, if you’re waiting for a sign, this is it!  Here’s how to turn into the person you haven’t had the courage to become while still loving yourself in the process.

Make A List Or Vision Board

Not only will it help you keep track of your goals it will also tell you the difference between a fleeting dream and an actual life-changing objective. Think of it like online shopping.  When you go to the cart and the total at checkout feels too high you just ditch the basket, right?  No big deal.  It’s easy to move forward because the items were just passing desires.  But, if you keep coming back to the same things over and over, putting them in your basket, and begin to scheme ways to afford them, then it’s more likely this need is the real deal.

The Decision Has Already Been Made

If you can’t possibly imagine living the way you are now for another year, then there’s nothing else you need to decide. It’s no longer could you change your life, but when will you do it.  There will come a time remaining tight in a bud will be more painful than the risk of blossoming.

A Journey Begins With A Single Decision

Job application. Gym membership. Plane ticket. Think of your journey by the baby steps you need to take to get there. Breaking it down piece by piece will make it more manageable.

The Grass Is Greener

In the Instagram pictures.  No really, it is.  But a filtered life is just that—filtered.  When you start sifting you lose pieces.  Pieces of you may need someday.  Take pride in who you are at this moment.  Practice loving yourself, your whole self.

Take Your Time

There are so many stories out there of people who just leaped.  They hated their bodies so they started working out 24/7.  Hated their city, so they just left. They hated their jobs so they just quit. Those stories are incredible but they aren’t feasible for everyone.  Be gentle with yourself if you can’t just leap.  I can’t count how many times I’ve wanted to be the leaper but my reality is I have a child, an illness that could be terminal if not managed, I have a partner, and I have a mortgage.  I have to calculate my leaps.  I used to beat myself up over this.  I felt less than because I couldn’t just “Follow my dreams.” Eventually I realized my attitude towards myself was holding me back more than the restrictions on my leaps.  Be patient, be kind and be gentle with yourself.  It is okay to take your time.

Peanut Butter And Jelly

Your extraordinary career will still have its ups and downs.  Your perfect relationship will still have disagreements, and there will forever be instances when you miss your connecting flight. If you’re looking for perfection, you need to realign your strategy.

Remember, you are working towards a dream that is made up of high points to celebrate and low points to learn from, and both are equally necessary. Like Peanut Butter and Jelly, highs and lows go together and make a beautiful (and delicious) life. The triumphs will make you the positive and confident person you want to be while the struggles will give you the resiliency to strive for more.  Lows are the peanut butter to the jelly.


Allison Avalon is a Blogger and self-help mogul originally from Northern California.  As a former counselor to at-risk youth Allison developed creative and inspiring new tactics to tackle self-doubt, negative self-worth and body issues.  In 2016 Allison created her website as a haven for one of kind, proprietary {IM}Possible workbooks and workshops promoting self-love, self-care, purpose mapping and Empower Parties. Additionally,  Allison moonlights as a personal wellness coach and motivational speaker for women and youth. You can connect with Allison on Instagram @allisonavalon.

*Photo by Rachel Deeb

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